L.A. Street Names

I found this at Curbed L.A., a video about how various LA streets got their names.  The info is fascinating, the delivery deathly.  I have no idea what they were thinking.  The narration is the worst, voices that might have well have been processed through a computer.  I can't believe the National History Museum of LA was responsible — do they want to perpetuate the myth that history is deadly boring?  Come on, guys, you're in Hollywood!

Anyway, thanks to the video, I finally found out how to pronounce Micheltorena Street!  Hallelujah!  It's me chell tor ena.  Micheltorena was a Spanish governor.  Turns out a lot of street names like La Cienega are named after big rancheros.

LA is an Oil Town — Didn't You Know?

I found this out when, one day, we were using one of the side roads near LAX and I saw rows and rows of little oil rigs.  I was like, "What?  Are we in Texas?"  Turns out LA produces a hell of a lot of oil.  Only no one knows it.  Like who would know that the Beverly Center shopping mall is an actively drilled oil field?  And the famous Farmer's Market on Fairfax?  I didn't, and I've logged a helluva lot of hours at both malls!  There's even a building on Pico that's a complete facade — just there to hide the oil wells!

I found all this out watching a scrappy little documentary called "Uneven Terrain: Oil of L.A."  So worth watching just for the shock value!  I mean, LA is the third largest oil field in all of the friggin' US!  So my question is this:  how come LA is so dirt poor right now?  Where is the money going?  I feel like we're living in Nigeria!  My god, even the citizens of Saudi Arabia see something from their oil revenue:  no income tax, free medical and free education!  All we get is a lame-ass mayor who'd rather cut the education budget than his own expenses.  Oh — and the Oscars.

The Pasadena Air Force

Living in Pasadena, one simply does not expect to be under siege from military-style helicopters.  Night and day, they roam overhead, searchlights at maximum intensity, avidly patrolling the deadly streets of Pasadena.  It would seem more reasonable to think we were all part of a big movie set.  Or a video game.  But, no, these helicopters are for real, used by the Pasadena police as a legitimate tool to enforce and deter crime.  Yes, to deter crime.  And I'm not kidding when I call it the Pasadena Air Force.  The police are using actual military planes from the Vietnam War era, which they got for free from a military surplus program.  Okay, they no longer have gun turrets or armor plating, but I still feel like Robert Duvall is going to pop out and napalm me.  (I will give the Pasadena council points for knowing how to get free stuff.)

There are more details in "Trouble Above", a very interesting article in the Pasadena Weekly.

Rose Bowl Parade Post Float Viewing

If you decide to go next year, here are a few things we learned.

1. You can buy tickets at the venue or through the website. If you buy advanced tickets through the website, it will cost you an extra $10 or so. Buying advanced tickets is supposed to save you time waiting in line at the venue, but we found out that if you go through the west gate near E Washington Boulevard, there's hardly a line at all.

2. Park-and-ride shuttles were provided at two locations but we were really glad we avoided the shuttles. The shuttle areas were such a mess, the roads surrounding them were clogged even for passersby. Instead, we parked near the venue on an off-street and walked the ten minutes. There were also enterprising people offering private parking for $5-$10. The lots near E Washington were pretty empty, even by 11.

3. Go early. We got there around 10 — by 10:30, the crowds were so thick, you could hardly move. There doesn't seem to be any attempts at crowd control at all.

Open Mic in Encino

Last Saturday, I read my piece "Tony Takitani" at an open mic. Sponsored by the California Writers Coalition, it was held in the mammoth Barnes & Noble in Encino. I've always thought it was great that book stores hold so many events, but there are definitely some downsides. After all, it's a sharing of private space and any event has to compete with the raison d'etre of a bookstore, better known as commerce, especially on a busy Saturday night, especially during the oh-so festive Christmas season.

Barnes & Noble decided to tuck the open mic way back in the hobby section. It was the kind of open mic where anyone who wanted to perform was welcomed. That night included a comic singer and two stand-up comedians. And a persistent Book Browser. Who kept creeping closer and closer towards the stage. While one of the stand-up comics was performing.

Maybe the browser was hoping for that unspoken social contract which says, "if I act oblivious of you, you will act oblivious of me". Or he might actually have thought he was invisible (this is LA). Unfortunately, he wasn't invisible. Especially to the stand-up comic. A confrontation ensued.

If the comic thought he'd humiliate the Browser into submission, it just didn't work out that way. This is LA. Everyone in LA is a performer. The Browser embraced his chance at improv. Jumping in with both feet, the Browser became the classic straight man and a comedy duo was born. Much to the comics chagrin.

Many thanks to the California Writers Coalition for hosting the event. They're trying to get some much needed community money from Chase so if you're on Facebook, please click on http://apps.facebook.com/chasecommunitygiving/charities/968447.

Food Poisoning

Why is it that whenever I get food poisoned in LA, it's always at the American food restaurants and never at the ethnic ones? You'd think it was the other way around, with so many of the ethnic restaurants getting B and C inspection ratings, but nope, it's always at the American food restaurants. And I eat out at the ethnic restaurants a helluva a lot more too. And it usually involves beef.*

*Of course, I don't eat a lot of sushi -- that's a story in of itself...and sushi is barely ethnic anymore, sort of like pizza and spaghetti...

American Food

Food and LA. I love eating here, so many restaurants, so many different kids of food, so many places to try. But when I think up a list of all my favorite places to eat, the list is filled mostly with ethnic places, usually Asian. Which leaves me surprised. Why are there so few great American food restaurants? Not the expensive, must-reserve, Frenchified or Italianized places, but the every day eating joints where you can pop in anytime for a really satisfying meal.

I do like Pann's — it's one of my favorite places and a near perfect dining experience: great Googie architecture, great atmosphere, comfy booths, nice service, good comfort food. Musso and Frank is near perfect too. And there's Langers. Greenblatt's too. And I like Milk a lot. Du-par's has a fantastic Monte Cristo sandwich and their French dip isn't bad (but their service can be pretty annoying and the other dishes ho-hum). Phillipe's is fun. The Counter burger places are great too. And Fab Hot Dogs. But now I'm starting to run out of names, and for such a huge metropolis with so many restaurants, it seems like there should be so much more.

Often, I'll end up going to a place that gets mentioned in LA Weekly and I'll have a sandwich and think, "Wow. I could be at a Vietnamese banh mi place in the SGV. The food would be 80% better and I would have spent $5 - $10 less." A lot of the good American food places tend to be very specific too: like good only for breakfasts, good only for hamburgers, nice for Cincinnati-like chili (Chili John's) etc. There should be more places like Du-par's, only much, much better with less expensive choices. And the experience shouldn't be so inconsistent or so stressful. Like at The Golden State — getting a table can get rough, and the food can be really off (I once got sweet potato fries which were mostly black from having been burnt, and soggy, which defied my expectation because you'd think burnt food would be extra crispy — I mean, if you can't get your basic side right, what's the point of existing at all?). Oinkster is pretty inconsistent too (never go during the off hours, like 4 in the afternoon). Or at Father's Office, where the food is always fantastic, but the fight-for-your-own table situation so rough, the side to every meal is indigestion (last time we went, we had to play tag-team with another desperate couple — each couple stationing themselves at opposite ends of the restaurant, ready to swoop at the first signs of an emptying spot). The same at Apple Pan. The busiest Chinese dim sum houses give you numbers. Which is showing respect and consideration for your customers. After all, hospitality is as paramount as good food, isn't it?

I'd like a renaissance of American food. Not the cute interpretations at $20 a plate, but just good, classic fare, a nice blue plate special for $5.99. Last week, I spent an hour on the web looking for a basic caramel apple recipe — what I could find were the ones that advised you to buy candy at the store and melt it (telling you to buy the ready-to-use caramel wrappers is not a recipe)*. This is why I'd like an American food renaissance.

As an aside, here's an unscientific observation. The most demanding, enthusiastic and busy LA Yelp restaurant reviewers seem to be Asian. As a correlation, I often find Caucasian diners at American food restaurants to be not very discerning. Like I was at a nouveau Swedish restaurant and everyone around me was raving about the Swedish meatballs — I thought the meatballs were hard, not seasoned very well, and the milk gravy pretty appalling (I sighed and thought, "I could be eating the meatball plate at Ikea for around $6 — I would have gotten more meatballs, paid about 20% less, the food would have been more authentic, and tastier, too [I'm not saying Ikea food is gourmet or anything]."). To add to this, when I was in college, my fellow diners and I would spend hours complaining about how truly awful the dorm food was (mostly cheap cheese on carbs). The only diner to protest was Caucasian, and she said, "This is a lot better than what I got at home." Our hearts broke for her. So I wonder. Is the Asian food here so much better because Asians grow up eating good food at home (and I mean recent immigrants)? Certainly, there are a huge number of Asian immigrants concentrated in a very small area, but if they weren't so demanding, I'm sure the state of Chinese food in the SGV would be as blah as the state of the American food.

*I did finally find a wonderful recipe at Real Mom Kitchen. The caramel is to die for. Really.